Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The top 10 observations when attending Valleyfair.....

.....be warned! Several, but not all, of those revolve around the choice of swim suit!

For those of you not from around here, Valleyfair is an amusment park...think Lagoon. Ty and I spent out 5th aniversery riding rides that, in a reasonably sensible persons mind, should kill you with Jes and Kurt last week. I guess we are just big kids! I dare say this is one of the most fun Anniversaries yet! However, lets just say that more than just the roller coasters had me wanting to puke.

10. It is not acceptable to walk around all day wearing only your bikini top and short shorts any where else so why do it here?

9. One who spends more then 2 hours in an amusement park is somehow convinced that $4 for a soda is a 'good deal'.

8. It is perfectly acceptable to wear only your swim suit while hurdling full speed down a nearly vertical slide but you are in no way allowed to take off you shirt (guys only of coarse) when you are riding the wave. Discuss.

7. Husbands will often time do anything humanly possible to win a giant, and I do mean giant, stuffed dog that just happens to look like Blue just to make there wives happy.

6. Forbidden fantasies can be lived out through a mear $6 air brushed tattoo on the inside of ones wrist.

5. Parents should not allow there 5 year old to venture 5 feet out into the middle of a calm wave pool and than expect him to be fine once the waves start. If they do, concerned anniversary celebrating guests will grab said child to keep him from continuing to drown and return him to dry land while little drowning boys look at her like they want to cry.

4. 'Muffin Top' is real.

3. When nagged enough by ones husband....one finds the courage to go on terrifying roller coasters and learns that one likes them!

2. A giant tramp stamp (lower back tattoo) is made all the more ridiculous when it is your name with a swirly design around it and body glitter rubbed on it. I'm not kidding! I actually saw this.

and the number 1 observation is.....................

1. just because you are in the age ranges of 14-29 does not mean you are required by law to sport a bikini. If you have a less than tight physic.....avoid this choice in swim wear. I saw far too much of some peoples bodies and its time people take a good look at what will flatter. Between the cracks and the 2 sizes to small bottoms I beg of you to stop!!!!

5 comments:

Angela said...

you make me laugh. Thanks

Andie said...

Yes, Valleyfair and the State Fair are the ultimate examples of inappropriate bikinis (are they ever really appropriate?) and ill fitting and/or lack of proper undergarments.

I'm still thinking about that "Please Buy Yourself a Bra" booth for the State Fair this year. :)

Kristen said...

I am glad you guys had fun! I am jealous you got to go. Some of my favorite childhood memories were at Valleyfair. I guess I was too busy having fun to care about what other people were wearing, however as I have gotten older, I too, am shocked at what people wear with little concern about what others are thinking.

Andersen said...

I agree... people don't have and respect for themselves when they wear a bikini. And we wonder why there are so many date rapes or girls being taken advantage of. It is because they flaunt it.
I hope you didn't see any guys in speedos.

Jen said...

I love your blog!! You always make me laugh!!!